Out my window

Here are just a few things I am seeing out of my classroom window.

There is one of our 'gardeners' trimming the hedge with a weed wacker. It is, actually, a common way of doing that around here. Earlier in the year we saw that the school had purchased a lawnmower. You should have seen how excited the staff was to see that. They were crouched around it looking at the blades- meanwhile the mower was OPERATING! Myself and the headmaster had to run out and tell them to put shoes on. Funny thing is, we really don't have any lawn around here. It was used more as a slingshot to fire rocks around the schoolyard.

Yesterday, I watched the cleaning staff remove a beehive from behind the gym. The hive was about the size of a nice Xmas turkey. Here though, one would be geared up with a mask and gloves. I've watched Billy the Exterminator- I know what sort of evil pestilance bees can rain down on people. Anyways, these bees were the most unaggressive bees I have seen. However, the fact that all the cleaning staff did was light a cigarette and blow it on the the hive made me a little nervous. I am sure he come out unscathed. I little buzzed from smoking five cigarettes in 10 minutes, but he didn't get stung.

The men behind our apartment have been making great progress on the house behind us. It is interesting to think that these guys actually LIVE in the house as they build it. They have a campfire in what looks to be the garage. They hang their laundry up along the front. We see them walk around in towels after a shower. It funny to see them work as long as possible during a thunderstorm. Truly, unless the lightning hits the building, they will continue to work. Who needs safety? Just get the job done! If only we all thought that way.

Marni and I went to the St. Andrew's Society ball the other night. Common joke: If you want to see what a man wears under his kilt you'd better shine your shoes. It could be possible, though, to get them drunk enough that you might learn, too. We did eat the Haggis. And, it was quite tasty.

At the ball, we did learn the "Traditional Canadian Barn Dance". Everyone thought Marni and I knew it. I didn't know we had one. But, apparently the people from Ontario knew that one- Friggan Liberals!

Gold

This coming Friday is Lasmi's birthday. Lasmi is the youngest of our two nannies. She will turn 19. According to the lady on staff who is in charge of our staff, she left her town (about a 12 hr drive from here) when she was 16 to start working as a nanny. It is tough to imagine a 16 year old who works upwards of 12 hours per day, 6 days per week for a measly $150 per month. But, that puts her in a 'high end' wage earner bracket.

When asking around for what we should get the nanny the Indonesian staff tells us not to get anything for her. Really, they feel that they are not worthy to enjoy such luxuries. But, there is no convincing Zoe that there will be no birthday gift. Then, in speaking to another Indonesian staff member, she mentioned that many Indonesians by gold when they can. Reason being, they don't go to banks so buying gold jewelry is a way for them to invest. Later, if they need money, they can sell it.

So, off Marni and I went to look for some jewelry for Lasmi. Something we learned today- gold is listed in stores by the weight, not necessarily the price. We saw some gold medallions for sale in a jewelry store (5g, 10g, 25g). Right now, the price of gold is about 325 000 Rp per gram. Try finding some one gram earrings- good luck! Unfortunately for Lasmi, no gold, this year. Apparently, though, there is a market nearby where you can by gold by the gram. I am sure we will find out the 'Bule' price is quite high.

Sacrificial Goats

Marni, the kids and I went to a beach town of Pelabuhan Ruta. It reminded us of going to any other mountain town back home. There were little huts, stores and then a little town site and a few hotels. However, instead of huge hotels lining the beach, there were disheveled mom and pop restaurants and kiosks selling snacks and telephones.

One thing that caught our eyes was the pride people have in their property. Of course, we all have it. But, when you see what a house can look like here, you would think to yourself that these people are obviously just happy to have a roof over their head. Many of the houses are made of woven bamboo walls, some have thatched roofs. Often, the roofs are made of corrugated tin. But, as we were driving through some small towns I saw people painting or gardening and I thought "How interesting that they do still enjoy what they have." Back home, we might enjoy what we have but we all secretly want a little more. Or are envious of those that have more. I am sure they are envious, too. But, they seem a lot more content with their place in the world. That is good considering that there will be more space at the top for me!

Another image that struck us was the goats lining the streets. Everywhere we looked there were three or four goats just hanging around. Sadly, come Wednesday, there will be a few less goats. There is another Muslim holiday where the tradition is to sacrifice a goat and eat it. What brutes! What Archaic traditions! Who could ever imagine a holiday where a helpless animal is fattened up only to be sacrificed, hollowed out and stuffed with other food in order for humans to satisfy themselves? ......and then watch a football game?........and put a rock in their living room? No wonder 98% of Americans shown on Fox news (and 100% of goats) don't like Muslims!!

We were also privy to a number of 'make work' projects for the locals. Definitely, with western economies in the tank our governments can take a few ideas with them. For example:

When part of the road is washed out, instead of fixing the road, a few locals get together to direct traffic across the one lane of the road. Meanwhile, they hold out a collection box to take donations for their service.

Makeshift "toll" roads are erected in random spots along the mountain roads. But really, they are so non-aggressive that you can pass through unscathed.

The lifeguard on the swimming beach also moonlights as parking patrol. There was a large field for parking and about two cars. But, for 20 cents, he will help you back out. I do think that if you don't pay him a small child will "accidentally" be found under your vehicle. Meanwhile, there were 500 people swimming in the water.

Children with umbrellas running around parking lots just hoping it rains so they can cover you as you get out of your car. We would have about two or three of them racing to the car to save us. Fortunately, being an ignorant white person gives me license to not tip Plus, I don't know how much. I did give $5 to the lady who picked up Marni's shoes.


Some other events of the weekend:

Marni left her runners laying in a parking lot. Thank goodness they are so big that when we returned we found two local children playing in one of them.

There was, what seemed to be a local "Corporate challenge". Whoda thunk that Indonesian's can play beach volleyball? There were dancing competitions- a dance similar to the "Electric Slide" line dance was done.

Cows on the beach. Real cows, not fat ladies. Possibly just as funny but less awkward.

We saw an Indonesian Midget. Quite cute.

Don't wear life jackets in the ocean. Good words from the local (french-speaking) surfer guide, Dude.

Blasts from the past

Some things we notice as we walk around Jakarta, especially in the malls.

Bata Shoes- I remember my sister worked at Bata in 1985 or something like that. I don't even know if they still exist in Canada. Not that we could shop there, anyways. Zoe's feet are now the same size as the nannies.

Fido Dido- Remember the skinny stick person from the 7-Up commercials in the 90's. Marni mentioned that Kyle was crazy about him. Well, he is still making it over in Asia. Kind of like Micheal Jackson did. I guess, when something doesn't work, send it to Asia and they will fall in love with it.

I have already written about the Alberta 75th anniversary logo. Haven't seen another one, though.

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers- Yup, they still exist. Just the females are not near as hot as they were when I was 12.

Crocs- not that old but are probably the most common shoes here. I know what your secretly saying to yourself "But, I love crocs!". But, that is because you are a mental patient. We had a parent, very wealthy, with what must have been a $10 000 Rolex dripping with diamonds on her wrist, diamonds in her ears with more Karats then Bugs Bunny and a $30 pair of crocs. I know it makes me gay, but I notice things like that. Thanks Kathleen!


Some other things going on recently:

We were able to score tickets to the Marine Corps 235th birthday bash. Formal attire and freely poured, free booze. What a great night. Well worth the 1.5 hours in traffic. Marni was able wear her beautifully made, hand-crafted, custom fitted dress (which cost $175). She looked great and was able to win a bet with other ladies at our table by getting a piece of the B-day cake fed to her by an American Marine while holding Old Glory (that's the flag for those with twisted thoughts).

I realized that wearing a Flames hockey jersey to the local "NBA" games will definitely get the people looking. Granted, if I wear an Oilers Jersey I get booed. Weird how international that is. Another teacher, here wore her Raptors jersey and none of our students had any clue who the team was. There are only five teams in any sport that are recognized here.
1) Lakers (in fact, non of my students knew who the Celtics)
2) Yankees
3) Red Sox
4) Manchester United
5) Real Madrid

No other sports teams exist here. But, F1 racing is nuts.

Marni had her first Bajhi ride (that's the three-wheeled half motorbike, half-car that is the local taxi). It was fun. We were ripped off or commonly known as the "White-person tax" (keep it mind that ripped off cost me $3 instead of $2). And...the motor gets so hot that your shoes will melt in the backseat.

Some of our students are getting lazier. They are now waiting for their nannies to come to the classrooms after school and carry their bags to the car. Ironically, the student most guilty of this crime is also the fattest kid in school. Whoda thunk?

The zoo

A tough day, today as we went to the Jakarta zoo. It was just the kids and I as Marni is still in Malaysia on a conference. So, I thought I would ask the nannies (Fifi and Lasmi) if they wanted to go. They had never been to the zoo before so I thought it would be a nice treat for them.

One thing to understand about Jakarta, in general, is that signs are merely suggestions. That goes for road signs, stop lights or any sort of warning sign. Nobody gets angry if you do something wrong, so, do what you want at your convenience. I bring this up because of the large "Do not feed the animals" signs posted everywhere. What does it mean to the average Indonesian? Feed the animals whatever you have in your hand- potato chips, crackers, fruit. In fact, it can be translated into 'I'll have my three-year old do it for me in case I can snap a photo'. It does not matter that these are potentially dangerous animals.

I'm not going to lie. I have fallen victim to the 'photo op' since getting here. It is not everyday that a person can hold an orangutan or pet dolphins. But, when it comes to feeding the animals that are not used to being fed by the average person, I draw a line. In fact, I got a great one of Caden holding a snake. Not a tiny one, either. I was rather scared for the snake until the owner slapped it in the face to show how docile it was.

I did, at one point, yell at a person who was hanging his child (younger then Caden) over the railing and handing some baboon a cracker. When you see on a sign that these animals are endangered there is little reason why when you see idiots like this. It is similar to the people here on the side of the road with monkeys wearing kids clothes and riding wooden horses. People throw money at them and encourage them to get more monkeys.

Sadly, though, many of the primates come down to the front of the cages and put their hands out because they are used to getting fed. It really is sad. I wished that one of the monkeys grabbed a person and smashed their heads into cage bars. That would have been a good photo!

There was a huge Orangutan enclosure where people were actually throwing food OVER the 'Do not feed the animals' sign. Now I know why monkeys fling shit. They are out of things to throw back.

Overall, though, the zoo is quite nice. They are building some large areas for certain animals. There is a huge variety of animals and they have a beautiful primate park- problem with it is that you walk all over the place and rarely see a primate.

Once more we were followed by the paparazzi. This time I got involved, too. People were friendly about it but with the kids I started to cover their faces when I saw people lining up for photos. At one point there was a huge silverback gorilla, maybe 20 feet away and there were twenty people snapping pictures of Caden and Zoe playing on the rocks. The nannies were very good though. They started telling people that pictures were 10 000 Rp, apiece. Some were actually offended while others got the message. People were yelling at us to stop for photos and I had to tell them to leave us alone. We just wanted to enjoy the day. You would think they can't find white people on the internet.

There was one point where this older lady kept saddling up close to me. It was crowded, so I thought nothing of it. Then she did it again and I could tell by the expression on her face she was posing. When I looked to my right, there was her friend lining up a shot. I should have planted a kiss on her cheek or grabbed her ass!

I tell you, next time I hear on the news that some celebrity smacked a cameraman....I cheering for the celebrity. I know they get paid millions of dollars and have given up a lot of their privacy. But really? Slap the cameramen!

Superstitious

Seems how I have received a number of facebook posts regarding the fact that this October has 5 Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays. Somehow, that fact will provide me with great wealth if I use it as my facebook status. I find it hard to believe that Chinese feng shui cares about status I share with others. However, I thought I would share with you some of the stories we have heard regarding certain superstitions.

Our students were sharing some of their beliefs regarding spirits- which are very important in Indonesia. We were asking about the Gamalan, which is a musical instrument (or series of instruments). Basically, it is a bunch of brass pots, cymbals and gongs. In fact, that is the origin of our gongs (gong show). It is a traditional instrument of Indonesia. Sounds like a bunch of tin cans, but traditionally important.

Anyway, Marni and I noticed how the lights are always on around the gamalan. Apparently, spirits of the gamalan get upset if they are in the dark. So, the staff here always leave the lights on. Also, the gamalan needs to be alone. It doesn't like being surrounded by other instruments. So, in the school, we have a room specifically for the gamalan. Ironically, the night we heard this story, I noticed that the gamalan lights were off. I sneaked in, turned them on (the lights, not the spirits) and gained some brownie points (I hope).

Another superstition surrounding instruments is that you cannot play them alone at night. There is, apparently, something haunting and evil about the sounds instruments make and you cannot play them alone during the evening. Having a band, fine. I guess, though, not playing with yourself at night could be a reason there are 240 million Indonesians.

One of the Indonesian staff members was sharing a story with Marni about how she will not travel to Bali. The last time she was there, she had all kinds of sores on her feet, she was sick and just had a horrible experience. Allegedly, the day she left she was fine. According to her (and I am sure many scientific minds) a spirit in Bali fell in love with her. When it realized it could not have her, it made her sick. Weird. She will never return to Bali.

Even when we had our lock-in, we played a game called Zombie tag. Many of the students were very careful what they said about Zombies. They have a healthy respect for the dead. Nothing wrong with that. They are totally into watching every type of horror movie, but they won't disrespect the dead.

I am unsure as to what they think of, and how they celebrate Halloween. I will find out this weekend.

....ummmm

I am sure you are all missing what I have to say so I will ramble.

Some things that have happened, recently:

The extra security from out front have left. There has been a lease extension until June 30th for us. After that we need to find somewhere else to have a school It is a shame, the campus is beautiful and the pool is amazing. Thank goodness Shamus got in for a few pictures before they all left. In fact, he scared the shit out of the security. They weren't sure what to think.

Caden got a report card from preschool. He is doing well. He can do "Head, shoulders, knees and toes"in Mandarin. Really cute if you have enough ice cream to make him do it. He is, apparently, very shy to everyone, though. Everybody in the area knows him, but he ignores them all. Obviously, some of Grandma's 'fear of everything including drowning, pumas and gullycats' has rubbed off. People will yell hello to him from across the street and he will not acknowledge them, at all. He is very popular though. No slushies in the face like on Glee.

Zoe was having a tough time, recently. She has told Marni and I that she wants more friends. She has a few and they are wonderful kids but she wants the older, mean girls to like her, too. She has started to out in class (as much as a grade 1 will do) in order to make them like her. But, after a little chat, that should not be a problem. The girls who is giving her a rough time is on a behaviour modification program because she is a real snotbag.

Although, Zoe did do a self portrait of herself in art class, recently where she coloured her hair black. She is realizing that she is very different and, of course, wants to be like everyone else. It is kind of sad to see how strong those feelings are at such an early age. I feel for many of you that were probably (definitely) losers in school (you know who I'm talking about). Only the cool kids had huge, tinted glasses and feathered hair- but I do know of some that had a mullet until 2004....Simon. But, it was a cool mullet and I am sure he has the hair in a Ziploc bag at home. I am confident there will be some witty banter in response to this but mark my words.....

I realized that some of my grade 8 Korean students would still need booster seats in Alberta. They only weigh about 60lbs. That just makes me chuckle to think about that- a 15 year in a booster seat.

We had a 'lock-in' last week where the Upper school kids stayed in the school all night. We realized that Zoe is taller then 3 of the grade 6's and weighs more then most of the grades 6's and 8's. She is actually having to buy woman's shoes, too. Her feet are like flippers. Caden is not far behind (not about buying woman's shoes but it wouldn't surprise me). Oh, and I fell out of a tree. It hurt. I don't bounce like I used to.

The rainy season is approaching. Each day, about an hour of the heaviest rain you've ever seen will fall. The Thunder is amazing. But, if it rains for two or three days they will probably have to shut the school down because of the flooding.

You all hear about any volcanoes well before we do. None are close, but thank you for the concern.

I also just realized that if I was writing this blog from my living room in St. Albert, none of you would care. Shame on you.